Great news for NSA leaker Edward Snowden. He’s just been named Cinnabon Customer of the Month in the Moscow airport.
It turns out the Pakistan police pulled Osama bin Laden over for speeding. Pulled him over and wrote the guy a ticket. So listen. I don’t want to hear any more of this nonsense about Pakistan being lenient on Osama bin Laden, OK?
Conservative rock star Ted Nugent says that he is thinking about running for president in 2016. Nugent said it’s always been his dream. Then Democrats said, Ours, too!’
This week at the White House, President Obama will present George Lucas with the National Medal of Arts, while Joe Biden will present him with some fan mail for Yoda.
Despite his prostitution scandal several years ago, Eliot Spitzer is running for comptroller of New York. He’s paying someone $800 a day to collect signatures to put him on the ballot. He said it’s the second best $800 he’s ever spent.
Televangelist Pat Robertson said he wishes Facebook had a vomit button’ he could push whenever someone posts a picture of a gay couple kissing. Of course, the other option would be for Pat Robertson to stop searching online for gay men kissing.
With Anthony Weiner and Eliot Spitzer running for political office, New York City is changing its nickname to The City That Never Sleeps With Its Wife.’
Texas Gov. Rick Perry says he will not run for governor for a fourth term, though he hasn’t ruled out running for president again. The voters have, he just hasn’t.