The best of recent jokes by late-night comedians:
Martha Stewart signs with Match.com. She’s getting tips from the CEO there. Wait, isn’t that insider dating?
It’s been two years since the SEAL team busted in and got Osama bin Laden. The guy never knew what hit him. It’s like being married to a Kardashian.
Senator Tom Coburn has introduced a new gun background check plan that would allow people to perform self-background checks before buying a gun. The way the plan works is, it doesn’t.
The NRA this week elected a new president, choosing Alabama lawyer Jim Porter, who recently referred to Attorney General Eric Holder as rabidly un-American’ and still calls the Civil War the War of Northern Aggression.’ He’s known around the NRA as Reasonable Jim.’
Yesterday President Obama warned Congress not to delay the immigration reform bill. You can tell he’s getting tough because if they keep delaying the bill, he says he might even warn them again.
There’s a new summer camp for adults where using cellphones and computers is banned. The camp has an interesting name: North Korea.
President Obama is in Mexico. He’ll be on hand to celebrate Mexico’s economic successes. See, that’s how it works now. If President Obama wants to celebrate an economic success, he actually has to leave the country.
While in Mexico, President Obama plans to promote his immigration policy. Is that really necessary? Seems the last place you have to promote immigration is Mexico. I think they’ve got it down. That’s like going to San Francisco to promote gay marriage.