The news that sexual harassment and assault in the military are more common than ever – not just that the number of reported incidents has climbed in the past two years but also that an estimated 26,000 personnel experienced unacceptable sexuallyThe best of recent jokes by late-night comedians:
Stephen Colbert
“Even though many have wanted to see Gitmo closed, including President Obama, … it remains open for business. It’s the Radio Shack of the War on Terror.”
“The War on Terror just turned 12 years old, which explains why it’s into remote-controlled planes.”
Conan O’Brien
“These automatic budget cuts are serious. It could negatively affect water and sewage services. In other words, all of America is about to embark on a Carnival cruise.”
“Today was Pope Benedict’s last day at work. Don’t be sad. All the other cardinals are buying him shots at the Vatican Applebee’s.”
Craig Ferguson
“According to a new study, Hawaii is the happiest place in America to live. And I thought it was just a great place to pretend you were born in.”
“Pope Benedict is officially retired. Apparently there was some last-minute tension at the Vatican because they wouldn’t give the pope his security deposit back.”
Jimmy Kimmel
“Pope Benedict has become the first Pope to retire in 600 years. You have to wonder what a Pope does in retirement. I heard a rumor he already cashed in his 401(k).”
Jay Leno
“In South Africa more than two-thirds of the meat products tested contained undeclared ingredients. Or as we call that in this country, a hot dog.”
“President Obama said this week that after four years as president, ‘You realize all the mistakes you’ve made.’ So apparently he does watch Fox News.”
